Motherhood? It's fabulous, thrilling, monotonous, exhausting, confusing, open-ended and freeing. There are so many mixed emotions about being a stay-at-home mom. In college I would never imagined living the life I have now. As a business student I imagined myself the young money monger of some fortune 500 company living the fabulously single, fashionably rich and frantically busy life blazing the untrodden path for both women and youth. Here I am 26 years old, married, staying at home with a 3 month old. My daily routines are hardly what I imagined 4 years ago (they definitely don't make Time magazine) and yet I feel more meaning in my routines than any non-profit or sales gig I had in L.A. or here in Redding. But, I do crave more.
As a new student to motherhood I want to achieve so many things. I want to be the wise, caring and encouraging wife. I want to be an available friend. I want a clean house. I want to be a fantastic cook. I want to be a good mother. I want to pursue a rewarding career. I want to be involved in my community. I want to look fabulous (and not smell of Perfume de leche). I want free-time. I want to travel overseas and across the U.S. I want to create with my mind and hands. Stereotypical to my generation I want ALL these things NOW! The best lesson I have learned is I don't have to have the perfect house, be flawlessly dresses, make immaculate meals, have a career that makes headlines. Baby steps. I take each day, measure each option. It's morning Miss Juliet (my precious baby) wakes up in a fabulous mood I need to clean the house because company is coming. I can...
a. Spend some time with Miss Juliet singing songs and making faces.
b. Or, put the kid in the swing, vacuum and do a quick dusting.
I opt now for the first option. It's rewarding to both of us. I've learned some things can wait (like the dust mites). Relationships are of NOW importance. House chores will always be there, but the option to spend special windows of time with people come and go.
Today, I choose to be intentional and make time to share special moments with people I love.
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